Memories
by NevaehNovella
Summary: After the final battle with the White Legs, Joshua and the Courier make their way back to camp, along the way Joshua remembers an event from his childhood between his mother and father.


**Hello, everyone. After playing Fallout: New Vegas (...again) this little idea came to mind and I decided to write it down. What made me decide to put it up was well, I've had a real pisser of a day and I needed something to distract myself. So I hope you all enjoy this little short.**

**P.S: I made a minor change in Joshua's dialogue to make it fit with this short.**

Joshua watched as the White Legs leader, Salt Upon Wounds fled down the river, like a dog with his tail between his legs. He could feel the heat of anger within him flare up once again as he watched the man run off without facing punishment for what he had done to his family at New Canaan, the pain he inflected upon the tribes of Zion, and the countless other lives he destroyed in his path. All in order to become a part of Caesar's Legion.

His grip on his .45 tightened; he was tempted to shoot the man in the back. It would be a fitting end for a monster such as Salt Upon Wounds. His eyes were on the target, mind clouded with hate when the Courier's words cut through the vengeful haze.

If what you believe is true she had told him, then he'll pay for it later.

He looked over at the Courier; the dirt and blood that marred her pale face exaggerated the fear and worry that swam in her large hazel eyes as she looked right back at him. Waiting, for him to make a move.

His grip on the pistol loosened and he let go of his breath.

She was right.

In time the man would face judgement for the sins he committed. The man's life was not for Joshua to take, he had to put his faith in the Lord and trust in Him.

"Joshua...?"

"That's it." Joshua sighed holstering his weapon. "It's finished. Let's go, tomorrow will be here soon, and there is still much to do."

"R-Right." she agreed, placing her rifle over her shoulder before following alongside Joshua out of the Three Marys.

Joshua and the Courier walked side by side in silence, a fair amount of distance between them as they made their way back to the Dead Horses camp. The only sounds that could be heard in the evening air were the sounds of their boots crunching along the loose dirt and rocks of the canyon floor, and the faint lapping splashes of water as it hugged the shore.

The Courier wiped a few strands of her dark brown hair away from her face and tucked it behind her ear. She looked up towards the sky; the stars still hung in the clear midnight sky, glimmering against the dark background. She drank in the scenery above her for all that it was worth, engraving it into her memory. She had a painful feeling that this would be the very last time she would ever gaze upon the heavens of Zion, and she wanted something pleasant to look back on when she returned to the hellscape of the Mojave.

After awhile she reluctantly returned her gaze back towards the path ahead of her. She didn't want to get caught in a hidden trap.

Joshua had been eerily silent since beginning their hike back to camp. She wondered if he was angry with her for convincing him to spare Salt Upon Wounds life.

She even began to question the choice she made in sparing his life. In the beginning she had been in favor in ending the War Lord's life, but after witnessing the raw anger and lack of remorse in Joshua's cold blue eyes as he shot dead two White Leg's warriors and after listening to the hate in his voice as he spoke down to Salt Upon Wounds she knew the flame that Daniel had warned her about was close to consuming Joshua whole.

And she refused to allow that flame to destroy him. Instead she had made the choice to convince Joshua to spare the man's life.

She wasn't sure at first if Joshua would listen to her words or not, but he did, but he gave no indication as to whether they made the right choice or not. The Courier began to fear a retaliation from the White Leg's. Her, Joshua, along with the Dead Horses and Sorrows they had greatly reduced the White Legs numbers, but there was still the small threat that by allowing their leader to live they could rebuild themselves and come back seeking retribution.

An unsettling feeling dropped in the pit of the Courier's stomach. She turned her gaze back towards the stars.

_"God..."_ she prayed silently, nervously, she even wondered if God would listen to a person like her, but Daniel and Joshua had told her countless times that all people were "God's children" (as they said).

_"If you can hear me, please, please, watch over the Sorrows and Dead Horses."_ Remembering Joshua and Daniel she added, _"and the New Canaanites...Amen."_

The weak attempt at prayer did settle her nerves, and a new form of calmness washed over her, but she still worried about Joshua. He still had not muttered a word.

She looked over at him to see how he was doing and stopped immediately in her tracks.

She spoke up nervously, "Uhh...Joshua..."

"Yes?" he asked, stopping to face her. She noted his eyes still held some traces in ice in them despite the calmness he held in his voice. "What is it?"

"Y-Your arm." She gestured towards the left limb.

"What about it?"

"It's bleeding."

"Hm?"

Joshua lifted his arm up to study the damage and came to find that most of the bandages that covered his fore arm were soaked with his own blood, from a cut that had somehow gone unnoticed.

"Well," said Joshua, feeling the sting from the cut settling in to his arm, "that is...unfortunate."

"Let me fix that up." The Courier said quickly, grabbing Joshua by his uninjured arm and leading him to a nearby boulder.

He was too taken aback by her boldness in grabbing him and ordering him around like a subordinate to even protest. She might have been the first person to ever lay a hand on him and give him an order.

It was strange to him, but he allowed her to lead him to the boulder where she then pushed him down by his shoulders and forced him to sit. The way she acted and the look of concern in her eyes towards him was something Joshua had not seen in quite some time.

"Wait there." She ordered removing her hands from his shoulders.

She then dashed off quickly back towards the river.

"What are you doing?" he asked curiously, watching her retreating back.

"Washing my hands." she called back over her shoulder.

She knelt down by the water and washed the dirt and grime from her hands hastily, but thoroughly, and just for added measures she poured a bit of vodka she kept in her medical bag for sterilization over her hands and rubbed the liquor all over her hands before returning back to Joshua.

"Could you hold out your arm?"

Joshua tensed up. He wasn't sure how to feel about letting someone else treat his injuries, especially someone like the Courier. He didn't know why, but it made him feel nervous.

"Don't be such a baby!" She suddenly snapped at him, "I have some medical skills."

The sharp tone in her voice surprised him; she usually kept her voice calm and level. He believed this was the first time he ever saw her truly mad at him.

"Alright." he sighed holding out his arm to her. It wasn't her tone that made him listen to her, it was the fierce determined look in her face that said she was going to treat his wound whether he willingly let her or not. Might as well take care of it now instead of risking infection later on.

He watched her carefully as she removed the torn bandages from his arm with her long lithe fingers, revealing the torn and burned skin. Her eyes were focused as she poured cool water from her canteen over his arm, her face set in concentration as she washed the blood away with a clean cloth from her medical supplies.

The act reminding Joshua of a memory from his childhood:

_"Samuel!" Joshua's mother's worry laced voice woke him from a peaceful slumber, "What happened?"_

_Curious and fearful as to what was happening Joshua tip toed over to the door and opened it up just enough to peek through without being seen. Through the crack he created in his door he could see his mother rushing about the home gathering up the few medical supplies they carried, and his father, cradling his bloody left arm._

_Joshua's eyes widened with horror and he wondered what had happened to his father._

_"It's nothing," his father spoke in a calm and reassuring voice, "It's only a scratch."_

_There was a pause in his mother's hasty movements, "Samuel..." his mother growled in warning, her icy blue eyes leveling on him, silently demanding that he tell her the truth, the whole truth._

_His father didn't answer right away; he seemed to have been debating with himself as to whether he wanted to say what happened or not. After a moment he expelled a heavy sigh and stated simply, "Raiders."_

_Joshua's hands flew to cover his mouth to hide his gasp, and his mother's eyes filled with dread and fear at hearing the word._

_"Don't worry," his father spoke quickly, his voice remaining calm, "they have been...dealt with." he avoided looking her in the eye, "We won't have to worry about them."_

_"Samuel..." his mother sighed with what sounded like frustration to Joshua, her shoulders slumped as though she was tired._

_"I'm sorry, Sarah." He heard his father apologize quietly. She didn't like it when he put himself in unnecessary danger. "But," he added strongly, "I'd rather risk my life than allow any arm to come to you or our son."_

_His mother did not reply right away. She looked at him with a strange combination of gratefulness, fear, and love for him._

_"Could you at least promise me to be a little bit more careful when, God forbid, there is trouble at our door?"_

_"It's not that simple, love." his father answered, "but for your sake, and for Joshua's sake I'll try."_

_"You're going to be the death of me, Sam." said his mother, a ghost of a smile hovered over her pink lips, "Now, lets take care of your arm."_

_Joshua watched as his mother lead his father over to the kitchen table and had him sit down in one of the chairs before beginning cleaning the cut on his arm with clean water._

_"You're lucky it's not that deep." his mother said studying the damage, "But I'm still going to use the alcohol, just to be safe." _

_"Do you have a bullet to bite?" his father muttered as a joke as she went to retrieve the alcohol._

_"I can give you a belt." his mother replied with a smirk._

_"I'll be alright."_

_"I hope so." she said returning back to his father's side with a bottle in hand. "Brace yourself," she warned leveling the bottle over his arm, "this is going to sting."_

Joshua was pulled back to the present when a blazing pain descended onto his arm.

"Agh! Shit!" he screamed out in pain, jerking his arm back.

"Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!" he heard the rushed, panicked apology of the Courier.

He looked over and saw the Courier with a distressed look on her face, holding a bottle of vodka in one hand.

"Sorry." She apologized again.

"No, no." Joshua spoke quickly, he didn't want her to feel bad about helping him, "I just wasn't...expecting that, is all."

The Courier seemed to relax a little at his words.

"Are you ok though?" she asked him.

He nodded yes.

"Sorry," she said a little sheepishly, "but I did warn you that it was going to sting."

"You did?" Joshua asked surprised. He didn't remember hearing her.

"Yes. Didn't you hear me?"

"I'll admit that my mind was...elsewhere." He confessed, "I apologize for that."

"Oh?" She seemed unsure of how to respond to him. "Well...I'm almost done. Try to sit still for a little while longer. Ok?"

"I'll try." Joshua replied dryly.

He looked down at his arm, the intense burning from the vodka now a mild irritation to him, and saw that a cut had covered most of his forearm. He assumed that he had received the injury from one of the White Leg's tribals' in close combat before killing them.

Who knows.

He couldn't remember much of the battle after he selfishly left the Courier behind in his blind rage, but it didn't matter. The ordeal was over and all that mattered now was that the tribes of Zion were now safe.

As was the Courier.

He watched her work in silence as she returned to tending to his arm. Her hands moved with practiced movements as she wrapped up the cut in fresh bandages; it did not take too long for her to complete her work.

"Done!" she exclaimed, tying off the bandage.

Joshua raised his arm and examined her handiwork, and he had to admit that she had done a decent job in treating his wound.

"How does your arm feel?"

_"Funny."_ Joshua thought. Those were the exact same words his mother asked his father when she had finished treating his injury:

_"It stings," Joshua's father answered, admiring his mother's medical work. "but I'll live."_

_"You'd better." his mother warned, half jokingly as she cleaned up the bloody mess. "I am not replacing you."_

_"That's a comfort." he murmured with a smile. "Is Joshua asleep?"_

_"Yes." his mother answered putting the alcohol back in the top cabinet out of Joshua's reach, "Why?"_

_"No reason." he said casually rising up from his seat._

_He walked over to stand by her side and dropped his bandaged arm over her shoulders._

_"Thank you, love." he said in a quiet and grateful tone before pulling her into a strong, loving embrace and whispering into her gold colored hair, "I love you."_

_Joshua saw his mother's eyes melt into warm pools of affection. She wrapped her slim arms around his torso and whispered back to him, "I love you too."_

_Joshua smiled at his parents, who were still unaware of his silent presence. He closed the door quietly before sneaking back into bed. Giving his parents the intimate moment he felt they deserved._

"It stings." Joshua answered her honestly, "But I'll live."

"Good to hear." The Courier said packing up her medical supplies, "I don't think the Dead Horses would forgive me if I'd let you anything happen to you."

"Only if it was you bringing harm to me." Joshua stated factually.

"I'm not that suicidal." said the Courier, her response making Joshua smirk.

"Ready to go?" she asked readjusting the strap of her medical kit over her shoulder.

She made to move to resume their hike, but before she could take a step Joshua stopped her.

Without warning he reached out and took hold of her hand; the unexpected contact sent a jolt of nerves up her arm and down her spine, the most surprising part to her was the way he held her hand within his. His grip was gentle and tender something that she did not expect from him (to her Joshua didn't seem like the type of person to make any sort of physical contact, not even a hand shake).

She looked over at him to see if he was ok, he was still seated on the boulder, but he kept his bent seeming to avoid looking at her.

"...Joshua...?"

"Thank you." he spoke so quietly at first she thought imagined it. He then turned his gaze up to meet hers; she noticed that the ice that he held in his gaze was no longer there, she looked carefully into his eyes but could not find it. Instead she saw a look of soft gratitude when he looked at her.

"Thank you for...staying with me. I couldn't have done this on my own."

The Courier looked at Joshua and gave him a warm look with a bright smile, "You're welcome."

She gave his hand a gentle squeeze and helped pull him up to his feet.

"Let's go," she said, the smile still on her face, "It's late and it's a long way back."

She held onto his hand a little longer than he expected before letting go. The absence of the feel of her delicate hand left a strange emptiness within Joshua's chest. Something that he did not expect to feel.

"Let's."

Resuming their walk Joshua thought back to moments before when the Courier looked at him; Her soft eyes reminded him of the same look his mother had whenever she looked at or spoke to his father. He wondered if the emotion he saw in her eyes was real or just something he imagined because of his reminiscing.

He wasn't sure.

But what he knew was real was the young woman walking right by his side, closer to him now than she had been before. Their shoulders only a breath away from each other.


End file.
